Common Mistakes People Make When It Comes To Relationships
Relationships are a cornerstone of happiness and living a full life. This is because relationships provide us with friends and family to share our lives with and people who can help us out in tough times. Good relationships also tend to bring us plenty of laughs and, as a result, lots of joy.
However, when it comes to building and maintaining relationships, there are a few mistakes we all tend to make. For example, people don’t realize it’s not enough to put time and effort into the relationship. It would be best if you also set boundaries and concentrate on honesty and sacrifice.
To help you avoid some basic errors that could hinder you from making relationships that benefit your personal and professional life, Samsarga has put together a list of common mistakes people make so you don’t do the same.
1. Blaming others
Believing that the other person in the relationship is responsible for your emotional suffering is a massive mistake. Blaming others is easy. It means you don’t have to be vulnerable or hold yourself accountable. By blaming others, you lose the opportunity to work on yourself, stunt your personal growth, make yourself powerless and negate the positive influence you could have on yourself and others around you.
2. Holding on to the past
Letting go of the past can be challenging, but emotional scars from our past can ruin our present relationships. Holding on to past experiences can make us jittery and skeptical in the new relationship and stop us from appreciating our present. Moving on from past mistakes requires you to identify what you value about the relationship and forgive those who wronged you, including yourself.
Another very common mistake people make is overthinking about their problems. They think that by obsessing over the thought, they will magically find a solution. Overthinking in relationships can lead to a myriad of problems. Essentially, you’re living in the future or the past and aren’t able to be emotionally available in the moment. Due to overthinking, many people experience significant emotional distress and anxiety.
4. Holding on to anger and negative thought patterns
Some anger in a relationship is expected. However, if it is not understood and resolved, it may lead to ambivalence and resentment. People often believe their intense emotions, like anger and jealousy, cannot be changed, which is a big mistake. The psychological impact of anger isn’t just damaging to the individual, but it also destroys relationships and families and cripples our ability to build deep connections with others.
5. Not realizing they are the only ones who can make a change
Finally, a mistake we see far too often is people not realizing they can be the change in their relationship. Instead of becoming a better person, focusing on the issues at hand and taking responsibility, they stay in bad relationships with the desire to change the other. As Dr. Harriet Lerner of Marriage Rules writes, “If you don’t change your part in a stuck pattern, no change will occur.”
To avoid these and other mistakes, reach out to me at Samsarga. I am a Calgary-based life coach and Reiki master. I offer online courses and training, and one-on-one coaching. As my services are remotely available, I see clients from across the globe, including Northwest Calgary, Calgary, Alberta, Canada, USA, UAE, and India.
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